


Hermione_Granger has left the chat.

by olly_octopus



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: @theo u can literally fuck me up wearing that shirt, F/M, M/M, also OP amuses themself, and it’s v gay, draco Malfoy is hot in a white button up shirt, groupchat, i mean what, lowkey based on a true story, sheer cheerful nonsense honestly, what do u want me to say, wrote this for shits n giggles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2018-12-23
Packaged: 2019-09-25 18:36:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17126618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/olly_octopus/pseuds/olly_octopus
Summary: TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: okay but im having a panic attack and i physically cannot explain to anyone *why*kissmeimirish: sure u cankissmeimirish: “good morning everyone I want Draco Malfoy to sit on my face. while wearing this one very specific shirt”kissmeimirish: there ive done all the hard work for u already aren’t u glad im here x





	Hermione_Granger has left the chat.

**Author's Note:**

> ok but deadass still not over the white button up shirt worn by my friend who i call my friend bc it’s easiet than saying ‘the dude who im projecting someone else onto but it’s chill bc neither of them like me’
> 
> please read my bullshit thanks

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy created the group “ayy i might die”

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy added Hermione_Granger, roonilwaslib

Hermione_Granger: Oh no, please don’t die on us; you’ve managed to survive being cursed by the most evil wizard of the century. What’s bad enough to finally finish you off?

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: i am a white mans whore

roonilwaslib: lmao m8 grass is green what else is new

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: im STRESSED and i have a thing for BOYS in WHITE BUTTON UP SHIRTS

roonilwaslib: omg 

roonilwaslib added blaize_on_me

blaize_on_me: wait why am I here?

blaize_on_me: ,,,omg

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: OI CAN U NOT SHARE THIS WITH OTHERS??? IM HAVING A C R I S I S

roonilwaslib: dont worry ill make my own specific group chat later that will be purely screenshots u might as well just spill all ur shit now

Hermionie_Granger: Don’t be horrible, Ron.

roonilwaslib: ????im not

roonilwaslib: im being v funny

roonilwaslib: its different babe xx

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: so?? Draco Malfoy rocked up to the study group in a thin white button up shirt?? and I am physically having a panic attack

roonilwaslib added kissmeimirish

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: is

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: is that seamus

kissmeimirish: maybe

roonilwaslib: Irish guys in white button up shirts > Malfoy in a white button up shirt

kissmeimirish: fax

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: how did u know it was malfoy,,,,,

Hermione_Granger: Harry, I’d be extremely surprised if it were anyone else.

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: ah

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: u dont know that tho

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: it could have been cedric or smth

blaize_on_me: oh he is *so* fit

roonilwaslib: fuck off blaize we all know ur halfway up his ass

blaize_on_me: deadass who isnt tho

roonilwaslib: This Is True

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: okay but im having a panic attack and i physically cannot explain to anyone *why*

kissmeimirish: sure u can

kissmeimirish: “good morning everyone I want Draco Malfoy to sit on my face. while wearing this one very specific shirt”

kissmeimirish: there ive done all the hard work for u already aren’t u glad im here x

roonilwaslib: a babe truly 

roonilwaslib added baked-dean

baked-dean: good morning motherfuckers

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: ron istfg

roonilwaslib: shut up before i invite snape

Hermione_Granger: Well, I still think that Harry should take Draco aside and explain his feelings to him. He’s doing no good by just venting to a group chat filled with rather silly fifteen year old wizards. (No offence.)

kissmeimirish: none taken babs x

roonilwaslib: i take offence

baked-dean: yeah but ur a twat

roonilwaslib: i brought u into this chat i can take u right out m8

kissmeimirish: ???stop threatening my boyfriend 

roonilwaslib: I will do whatever the everloving fuck i feel like. bruv

roonilwaslib: ive had to sit through yall making out in the boys dorm

roonilwaslib: literally fuck off

blaize_on_me: omg

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: guys don’t freak out

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: but uh

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: i may or may not have Malfoy’s leg on mine???? what does that mean 

roonilwaslib: fuck him

roonilwaslib: as soon as possible 

roonilwaslib: as hard as possible 

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: maybe it’s a mistake?

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: ???????????????

kissmeimirish: ok luv u keep telling ur self that <3

roonilwaslib: im going to cry from frustration this Is Not A Drill

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: hhhh white button up shirt and warm warm leg

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: hhhhhhh

Hermione_Granger: Harry, that’s a very good sign! 

roonilwaslib: But Are You Fucking

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: sadly not

roonilwaslib: unbelievable

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: oh wait no ok he’s removed his leg

roonilwaslib: yeah cos u didnt give him a blowjob on the spot

kissmeimirish: if dean put his leg on mine in a public place id probably give him a blowjob on the spot 

baked-dean: good

baked-dean: fantastic news everyone i dont need a Christmas present!! just for everyone to tactfully avert their eyes as my bf gives me a blowjob under the restaurant table

kissmeimirish: or watch if ur into that

kissmeimirish: (im into that)

blaize_on_me: where am i 

roonilwaslib: an orgy

blaize_on_me: ohhh well it makes sense now thanks 

Hermione_Granger: You’re all disgusting; I just want you to know that.

kissmeimirish: boys eh hermione 

Hermione_Granger: You’re not funny, Seamus.

kissmeimirish: incorrect, im hilarious 

roonilwaslib: can confirm this

Hermione_Granger: Where did Harry get to? Why do I always have to be the fun police? Can’t he do it for once?

roonilwaslib: he’s //busy//

baked-dean: god i hope so i have a long long list of puns ive been saving specifically for when they finally get it it on

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: Please can everyone kindly shut up I’m trying to experience the best day of my life and Potter’s phone keeps going off 

roonilwaslib: omg

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy: Don’t make me throw the phone against the wall, Weasley 

roonilwaslib: o m g

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy left the chat.

kissmeimirish: nooooooooooooooooooooo

kissmeimirish: Draco come backkkkkkkkkkkkkk

roonilwaslib added TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy

roonilwaslib: dont let us stop u but pics?

TheBoyWhoHasWetDreamsAboutMalfoy left the chat.

Hermione_Granger: You all disgust me.

roonilwaslib: fuck off hermione u wanted pics too

Hermione_Granger: I wanted nothing of the sort. Horrible boy.

kissmeimirish: if anyones interested ik where the marauders map is

baked-dean: I love u and I don’t tell u often enough

kissmeimirish: ily too x

Hermione_Granger has left the chat.

roonilwaslib: lads night out then :)

kissmeimirish: amen :)

**Author's Note:**

> please leave comments and kudos im tipsy


End file.
